It’s my favorite fucking time of year. Leaves are changing, the whores are horney and hockey and football are flaring up like my dads shower warts.
Yeah because I give 2 fucking rat cunt hairs what anyone thinks. My friends this is the best time of year. The NHL pre season is oozing with talent and is getting my taint extra sweaty just thinking about how many vodka vodkas I’m going to butt chug at the Joe for it’s farewell season. It breaks my heart. Just think of the legends that have graced the ice with such smoothness, cross overs of the gods. Lettuce like the great one….sigh.
It’s going to be a real treat! Speaking of treats who’s ready to carve some pumpkins? It’s Halloween time! You get to dress up as your favorite character and act like a total jackass! No one cares? Yeah! Here’s the chance to stick your tongue down jack sparrows throat as he diddles your twat. Gives a whole new meaning to sticking your fingers in the bowl of candy.
Thanksgiving,turkey,booze and parades ….wait speaking of parades when the FUCK! Is the next pride parade ?! Free love baby! I’m trying to drink appletinis out a dildo! Fuck the thanksgiving parade this is where it’s at!
Whether it’s sober Sunday or your gonna be up all night decorating or making that delicious warm apple pie ( not the kind you stick your dick in ) you can sleep when your dead so don’t be afraid of getting on team no sleep.