I wake up from a lovely and cultured night of theater and vodka waters and I can’t believe my eyes. Listen up Mother Nature, cut the shit. Talk about a typical indecisive woman:

“omg I don’t think it should be cold in November.”

“Ugh, I feel like Michigan should get some hurricane strength wind and rain.”

“What is Thanksgiving without snow?”

“NEVER MIND I WANT IT TO BE WARM ON THANKSGIVING!”

That’s an exact description of weather from last week through the forecast for Thanksgiving. Can father time just tell Mother Nature to take a Xanax and get a Peppermint Mocha? Honestly that would take care of everything.

Regardless of what the forecast is, it’s snowing right now. That’s literally the only thing in this world that I know. That means that it’s time for my Fireball consumption to triple in an effort to stay warm. I’m not positive, but I think Fireball provides health benefits when it snows. Don’t quote me on that, unless you want to. With that, have yourselves a nice little Saturday and pray to Zeus that this shitty weather ends soon.

PS – relevant song from MR WORLD WIDE